Saturday, November 08, 2008

What we do when we are bored? ?(Re-edited)



I realised that the last time i tried to upload a video on October 15, it was not able to play. So here is the re-edited version of the last entry. Enjoy!



Side note: It's in malay. So you might need an interpreter

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Pretentious – Political Stance



Was sitting at Starbucks one night with a certain someone and overheard some conversation in the background about some office politics.

Stranger 1: If she is so f***ing unhappy with the whole environment, she should have just move on to another place!
Stranger 2: Yeah. I really don’t get her you know. Complaint so much.
Stranger 3: she should have just move to the office in Hong Kong, and then she would know how to appreciate things here.
Stranger 1: Such an ungrateful b****!
And the conversation went on and on and on...

That was when it suddenly struck me on the politics between artistes. Usually, politics between artistes are more under wrap and less obvious. All thanks to their ability to “act” and cover up their hatred and despise for one another with lots of smile and read-between-the-lines-kinda-conversations. It is similar to that of gay politics. In fact, the only thing that ever comes close to artistes’ politics would be of those between gays. An example would be of such:

Gay 1 and Gay 2 bumped into each other outside a club called, Play. they talked...

Gay 1: Hey.

Gay 2: Oh my god! Long time no see. (Oh my god! Of all people, fate made me meet you?!)

Gay 1: How have you been? ( Please tell me that you’re not attached and that you’re leading a miserable life!)

Gay 2: Oh. Life is okay. As per normal. ( I hope you’re life is more miserable than mine)

Gay 1: You’re here alone? (Considering that you’re dressing up like a slut and looking desperate, i bet you’re oh-so-pathetically-single)

Gay 2: No. I am with my boyfriend. (That ought to have wiped off your fake smiley face bitch!)

Gay 1: Where is he? (You’re such a liar!)

Gay 2: Oh just give me a minute. I’ll go and get him. (Where is that fucking bf of mine when i need him). There the one is red. (My BF is soo cute, you would just have to admit that your life is now more miserable than mine).

Gay 1: Which one? ( i hope it is that bald and fat-bellied man or that scrawny ill-nourished geek).

Gay 2: Sayang. Some over here! (Asswipe! What is he doing at the counter taking drinks for himself only!)

Gay 1: Oh. He is the lucky one. (Oh my god! you’re so cute!! And yet so unlucky to be stucked with a bitch.)

Gay 2: Oh I love to talk more with you. (NOT!) but i really need to go somewhere. (I rather have sex with a cow than talk with you, if you know what i mean?)

Gay 1: Where are you heading to? (To hell i hope, and please leave behind this cute hunky guy that you are so undeserving of as a bf)

Gay 2: Oh. We are heading to cinneleisure to watch some artsy movie. (Anywhere would be better than being stuck here talking to you)

Gay 1: Oh okay. Keep in touch. (Yes. Keep in touch so that i can grab my hands on your cute little bf whom you so don’t deserve!

Gay 2: Yeah. Keep in touch. (Whatever bitch!)

Gay 1: See you around. ( I am so gonna snatch your bf one day and hope to see you when i am attached to him!)

Gay 2: Yeah bye. (Fuck off bitch!)

Just a side note: The words in green reflects what they are really thinking about.

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Ke-deng-deng!



When I opened my mail today, this is what i saw:

15 Nov show in brunei.. .available? (Go on 15 nov, return 16 nov.) all expenses paid for including meal allowance.

Kien

Unfortunately I have made an appointment on that day. So I had to reply:

Sorry Kien. I am not available on that day.

Side note: Oh well, one opportunity gone, there will come another. Just have to have faith. Insya'allah.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

What we do when we are OH_SO_BORED





Disclaimer: This video is an impromptu work. Any form of personal attack is unintetional.

Note: At the moment, I have forgotten how to add the mute button to the flash banner on top of my blog. So if you want to listen to the video, You might have to wait for the song to end first.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Someone must do it...



I did what i had to do
I know it's a risk. I might be the next one to be X-ed.
But enough is enough
Someone had to do it
And since no one took the step
I lept
And i did it
Now awaiting for judgement.
No matter what the outcome is,
I have faith
that GOD is fair
And HE knows better.

Friday, October 03, 2008

5 things that annoy me about Raffles Place and City Hall MRT stations



1. People who squeeze into the train even before I’m able to get out. Fine, this happens in every station. I normally just walk into them and take pleasure in knocking them backwards. They get a rude shock while I pretend not to notice.


2. People who try to squeeze (or worse, jump) into the packed train even though there’s clearly no space for them. Okay this happens at other stations too. If they make the mistake of trying to squeeze right beside me, I won’t budge a single bit for them. In fact, I’ll shift a little to fill up the space they’re attempting to get occupy, so that they quickly become conscious of the futility of their endeavour as well as their immediate need to exit before the train doors interact with them. If they’re pretty, however, I gladly help them in like a true gentleman that I am. Unfortunately the pretty ones are usually too shy to squeeze beside me.


3. People who decide not to get on the train, but stand right outside the train door preventing me and others from getting in. This happens a lot, and I can never understand why. I really feel like knocking them over on my way in. It’s not like the train is packed. Sure, there aren’t any seats left, but there’s still plenty of standing room. But they prefer to stand outside. Nincompoops.


4. Taking the escalator down to the wrong platform. Which means I have to locate the escalator to the right platform, which means that I would have missed the earlier train by then, or if I’m lucky, I’d catch the earlier train, but I’d be blocked and annoyed by those mentioned in #3, before getting squashed and annoyed by those mentioned in #2.


5. Taking the escalator from the bottom (basement 3) platform, and ending up only in basement 2 instead of basement 1 where the exit is. Which means I either have to crawl up the stairs, or locate the (distant) escalator to basement 1, which is also another annoyance, adding to the annoyance mentioned in #1 which I experienced just before taking the wrong escalator.


Maybe someday I’ll also blog about Dhoby Ghot Doby Ghaut Dhoby Ghout Dhoby Gaut another station which I can never spell correctly and can never locate the right exit.



Disclaimer: This is not an original entry from me. I got it from Tinker Tailor

Thursday, September 18, 2008

In school, they will call my act PLAGIARISM, that is with a capital P. But i just cannot help it. This entry is too good to just be let go like that. And thus, i did and therefore i am. PLAGIARIS-er, with a capital P. IS there such a word? Whatever it is, do indulge in the following entry they way i did...




Brand and Product Names that may not do too well with Singaporeans and Malaysians




Building up your brand or product with a memorable and striking name is essential, but a name which works well in your country or region may be taken out of context in another part of the world. The brand name Siemens surely invokes sniggles among teenagers of the English speaking world.

Here are 36 which I could think of at the moment, in the part of the world I live in. Do let me know if you know of any other!

1)
Name of Product: Softlan
What is it actually selling: Fabric Softener
What it sounds to us: Lan, in the Chinese dialect Hokkien, is the Penis. And having a Soft-lan, in certain situations, is definitely not a good thing for both parties.

2)
Name of Product: DBI-Sala
What is it actually selling: Fall Protection Equipment in the Construction Industry, selling Body Harness, etc.
What it sounds to us: The Malay word Salah means wrong, and when you're talking about body harness and how it's supposed to save your life in case you fall, you so do not like it to go wrong. DBI-Sala products probably don't do so well in the Construction Industries of Malaysia and Indonesia.

3)
Name of Service: Pukii
What is it actually: A savings plan, catered for children, created by The Shanghai Commerical and Savings Bank. Also, the little piggy mascot's name.

What it sounds to us: Puki, in the Malay Language, is the cheebye, which is, in clinical terms, the Vagina. With TVCs such as these, you'll have the children of China singing the jingles which goes puki-puki-puki, kawaii!, while in another part of the world, sputtering the same word could earn the Malaysian/Singaporean kid a smack across the face from their parents.

Anyway, Check out the Puki City as well.

4)
Name of Company: KOTEH Auto Sales
What is it actually: A Canadian Car Sales Company
What it sounds like to us: KOTEH is dick in Tamil. Indians in Canada must have giggled.

5)
Picture Credit: Becca Sutton's Flickr

Name of Company: Wanko
What it is actually:A clothing line of Veeko International Holding Limited, Hong Kong. (Source). Executive wear, catered for women in their 30s.
What it sounds like to us: People in English speaking worlds would tell you: to wank is to masturbate, and though it's an activity people engage themselves in once in a while, no one enjoys being called a wanker. Much less tell people that you work in a place called Wanko.

Wanko has opened several branches in the shopping malls of Singapore, so you'll have people like my poor chinese-educated mother enjoying the smart executive clothes, totally clueless. And no, I can't explain it to her. I don't know how to say " to masturbate" in Mandarin.

6)
Name of Company: Pondan
What it is actually:Manufacturers of Baking Ingredients from Indonesia. Here's their website.
What it sounds like to us: Pondans are how the Malays call transvestites, and sometimes, effeminate men. Nama Salah lah, brudder.




For more intellectual entries, do drop by Jiayuan's Blog

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Letter from the Management



> EFFECTIVE SEPTEMBER 1, 2008
>
>
> NEW OFFICE POLICY
> Dress Code:
> 1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary.
> 2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will
> assume you are
> doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.
> 3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so
> that you may
> buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.
> 4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and
> therefore you do not
> need a raise.
> Sick Days:
> We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you
> are able to go to
> the doctor, you are able to come to work.
>
>
> Personal Days:
> Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called
> Saturdays & Sundays.
> Bereavement Leave:
> This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead
> friends, relatives or
> co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend the
> funeral
> arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is
> necessary, the
> funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow
> you to work through
> your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
>
> Bathroom Breaks:
> Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict
> three-minute time
> limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the
> toilet paper roll will
> retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
> second offense, your
> picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the 'Chronic
> Offenders' category.
> Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's
> mental health policy.
>
>
> Lunch Break: (Love this one)
>
>
> * Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that
> they can look healthy.
>
>
> * Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to
> maintain their average figure.
>
>
> * Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed
> to drink a Slim-Fast.
>
> Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a
> positive employment
> experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
> frustrations, irritations,
> aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations,
> consternation and input
> should be directed elsewhere.
>
>
> The Management

Sunday, September 14, 2008

From the Start till the End



Some of you may have known about my latest relationship with this person by the name of Amir. We got together on the 17th December 2008, 2 days after we met each oither. We broke up on the 15th March 2008. That is how far most people knew about the relationship. And i didn't talk much about it as i was still grappling with the whole issues pertaining to the relationship and I was having difficulty. When i finally blogged about it, it was like 4 months after the relationship has ended. Nonetheless, I still update this blog accordingly, in respect of the so-called sacred dates. However, i find it hard for the readers to navigate thorugh the whole blog just to get the whole story. So, as the writer cum producer of this bliog, i have decided to compile everything into one entry (of course you may choose to navigate aroun the blog, shd you feel adventurous and wated to find out more)for your erm... reading pleasures. (i know some people find pleasures in my pain, we need not mention who, of course). Just a little reminder, read the entry with a pinch of salt. It is after all, from my point of view, and i might therefore tend to sound biased. Do feel free to approach Amir for his side of the story. Apart from this, feel free to read on...

the start of a blossoming love

published on 19/12/2008

Taken from friendster (22/11/2007):
AMAC wants to brighten your day with a smile. Check out AMAC's profile and send a reply.
A message from AMAC:
hai....

And then Adi replied (22/11/2008):
hello back at ya.... hehe

A message from AMAC (23/11/2007):
haha.....btw u cute...haha...
anywae u str8 or...?

Then Adi replied (23/11/2008):
thnks dude..i swing both ways...bi

A message from AMAC (23/11/2007):
ouh.....
btw...hav u been to pwrhse b4??
cuz u look familliar actuaily....

Then Adi replied(27/11/2008):
nope...nvr been there..am not really a clubber...

A message from AMAC (30/11/2007):
ouh must b wrong person.....soowieee....btw add me...

A message from AMAC (6/12/2007):
btw...senang2 nak mit...........?

The Adi replied (7/12/2008)
Sure. Anything you can just call me at 91******.

Adi and AMAC chatted for a while and then they met on 16/12/2008
They got attached on 17/12/2008.
Then they have established that Adi is Spiderman and AMAC is Jean Grey.

A message from AMAC (19/12/2007):
saaaayaanng! lup u so much!
take care k...
lup u my hero......
-amir
jean grey!
hahah
mmuuuuuaaaackZ!

Then they further established Adi as MAriah Carey and AMAC as RIHANNA.
They began their wonderful relationship on the 17 December 2007.


Our first outing

published on 22/12/2007
this is taken from our very first outing at Cathay!







Our first picture as a couple.

Happy birthday SYG!



Tired. Yet happy. Celebrated SYG’s birthday. So i just let the picture do the talking for today...






































And of course the little video...




The present i gave syg! Happy birthday syg! Lup u many many!

The Break-up

published on the 16.3.2008

The break up happened through a series of SMS exchanges and a single phone call...

Amir: Wuah daa pandai tinggalkan and high note kat org. Org mcm u aru kite tahu... dapat baru lamer u buat macam sampah.
Amir: ok...nape i tak leh bangkit citer lamer, u bole. U ingat i bodoh. Tak pena masok kedai AX skg u daa pandai... ape untok cine tu kan? Eh, org mcm u i daa tahu ur true color.
Amir: jangan nak belitkan citer... i tak pernah and sound pasal AX ke ape kat u. Nape u tibe tiba? I know AX cine nyer fav brand.
Amir: I m so dispointed. U daa mcm gini takpelah...u slamat ngan Kenny. Send my regards to him.
Amir: I gip u tym to choose me or Kenny? Watever ur decision is gud or bad, i respect. I nk u fikir masak masak. I takmu perkara ni terjadi like last time. U hv to make a clear decision. Tink through it.

Amir: Oo! Abeh caya. Bodoh nah! Btw, aku puas dpt kikis duit ko. Sebenarnya motive aku nk bodok bodohkan org pandai mcm kau. Tak sangka boleh bodoh kan kau easily.
Amir: Bodoh ko bodoh nah ke tak tahu mane juboh masne puki? Wake up bitch!

Post Break up

Published on 05.06.2008

After the break-up, Adi and Amir still contacted each other. Adi tried to patched things up, but Amir kept on sayin that he is not ready. Adi and Amir then made a pact; that if either of them should find someone they want to settle with, they should inform each other, so that no one will be waiting in vain. But along the way, Amir suddenly went DEAD, until one day...

Amir: Awk. How r u?
Adi: I am fine. Thank you.
Amir: Awk kita no longer werkin at aldo tau. So kita da takde pat vivo.
Adi: oh. Abe hawk keje pat mana skrg?
Amir: Kite mintak admin kat DHL. Entah can get or not.
Adi:So skrg nie u menganggur?
Amir: Yeah. Sebab kerja i rabak ah. I nak mintak off pun susah. Then i kena keje almost non stop. When i apply urgent leave terus diorang terminate i cakap attendance poor. Btw, did u find sumone oredi?
Adi: Nope.
Amir: Oh ok.
Adi: I know you are attached already?
Amir: Mana awak tahu?
Adi: Sumone lah told me. Sumber yang boleh dipercayai.
Amir: Saper awk? I bukan nyer popular sey...
Adi: Ade lah...
Amir: Awk, bilanglah awk. Pls...
Adi: Not important ;ah who told me. Yang penting u happy with the person u r attached with.
Amir: K la. I dun force u. Awk tahu, my father tak habis habis seh bising pasal i tak keje. Dier asik cakap pasal future lah semua keluar.
Adi: Maybe dia nak ngok u jadi father yang responsible one day.
Amir: I jady father. Haha. No way i tak akan kawin awk U...we still fren rite?
Adi: Yup.
Amir: I takmo lost contact with u.
Adi: Insya’allah tak awk...

Post break up part 2

Published on 28.7.2008

Through SMS-es...

Amir: Awk. Am i a bad person?
Adi: Erm.. i think you should know yourself better. Do you think you are a bad person?
Amir: I think i am ok jer.
Adi: Ifyou think you are okie, the you are okie loh. Cuma i nak tanya one question. Asal when you got attached you nvr tell me? I tot we made a pact to inform each other if we have moved on so that no one will be waiting for another in vain. But when you got attached, u din tell me. U made me wait for you like a fool.
Amir: Cos my BF said u haf an affair with Daen when we are still together.
Adi: Wat?! Me adn din we r just colleagues. I did not even do anything with him after wat happened last year. I m so disappointed. I tot u knew me better.
Amir: No. Because info dier semua betul.
Adi: Whatever. I hope you are happy with him now.

And then days after that, Amir and his new BF broke up. I guess what goes around comes around...


p.s: Hopefully this marks the end of the whole thing, cos seriously, this is one of the most tiring relationship ever.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Puppetry workshop ended



YAY! I just had my last puppetry workshop a few days ago. Am very proud of them little ones. And btw...thanks MR Hairul for taking over two days of classes for me. Here are snippets of their puppetry shows... Enjoy!






Thursday, September 04, 2008

Things that I have been pondering



Sometimes I wonder why does some people like to criticise but they find it so hard to accept criticism? Doesn’t it work both ways? When you criticise people, you open up avenues for yourself to be patronised and criticised. If you feel that by criticising others, you are trying to improve them; then shouldn’t you accept criticism so that you too can be improved?

Does it make me a bitch if I speak up my mind? If i speak of what i think is the truth, i would be labelled a bitch. Why would people prefer to embrace hypocrisy? You know the all smiles-and-then-i’m-gonna-bitch-about-you-behind-your-back-attitude. I have seen how “best friends” bitched behind each other’s back. Why the preference for a facade?

Why do people like to preach and not practice what they preach? I have friends who speak about how when you drink, you are not allowed to fast. And HE speaks of the sins of being a homosexual. And SHE speaks of the sins of being a homosexual. Yet they drink. They smoke. He had premarital sex before, or what the muslims would have termed as ZINA. His best friend has piercings which he adores. Isn’t that what we called shubahat? I think I was blessed with pious parents who have educated me well in Islam. I believe i know more than these 2 friends of mine. Yes i have never preached to them about their lives like the way they did to others; not with the intention of making others better, but more of to show that they are better than the rest. In my most humble perspective, why preach when you cannot practice. Let me tell you the story of a prophet. A villager came and asked the prophet to advice his son not to eat sweets. The prophet came to the person’s house but he only looked at the boy and kept silent. He did this for three days. The villager then asked him why. And his reply was, “I love sweets and i ate them on impulse. That is why i don’t think i should be preaching to your boy about not eating sweets when i indulge myself in that activity”. This is why i guess he is a prophet, and my friends just remain normal humans.

Does it make me less of a muslim if i were to question about things i understand from Quran? I guess that is a lethal flaw. To believe without thinking. Should there be a being who claim himself as god one day, most of us would not be able to question otherwise; Cos we just believe without thinking. We are programmed to just follow orders. We are programmed to just be contented with what we have. To bershukur with what we have.

Sometimes i ask myself, what is my purpose here? I still have yet to find it. And i guess many people died not knowing.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

sMS exchange between Adi and Mr H



Mr H:I'm goin club wif my bro, yat. N my bf also will be there but wif his 1st bf. So if u r coming down, see u there k.

Adi: I m goin to Butter factory. Even if I m goin down to tanjong pagar area, i wud oni be goin to Tantrix.

Mr H: U r goin to tantrix with who?

Adi: With a straight colleague

Mr H: if u goin tantrix, let me know coz i m at play

Adi: Okay.


A few hours later...
Adi: I'm around tantrix

Mr H: I'm still at play. i m so drunk.

Adi: oh okie. Enjoy!

Mr H: Ni hairul tau. Where r u?

Adi: Tantrix.

A few hours after that, at ard 6 to be exact...

Mr H: I'm so sori to make you come down. Something happen just now at play. I really feel like shit lor just now. I think i m not fit 2 stay in dis world. N maybe i'm going to hilangkan diri i buat sementara.


At ard 8 am...
Adi: Sorry. Just got your msg. R u alright?

Mr H: Do i look alright to u?

Adi: I don't know. I didn't get to see you. Where you now?

Mr H: Home.i think i need some rest.

And that is the last thing i heard from beloved Mr H.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

PARTY - THE ARENA



Alter: Alright. I see you are all smiles. So what have been going on so far?

Adi: No. Actually this smile is as a result of some reflections that i have been doing so far.

Alter: And?

Adi: Do you know how blessed I felt?

Alter: What are you talking about?

Adi: I just realised that all this while I have been blessed with good people around me. You know
people whom i can laways count on. People who will come tio my aid without expecting anything in returns. An example would be these bunch of friends whom i got to know since my poly years. It cannot be denied that we have all quarelled with one another on many occassions, but here we are again. Together.

















Alter: And where were these taken?

Adi: It was taken in The Arena. The place there is like super HAWWT! One of the rare occassions where i go to a straight club. We were there to sort of you know let our demons out before the fasting month commences in September.

Alter: And i see some cleavage here.

Adi: (laughs) Stop that. Initially i was in my black singlet, and then the bouncer said to me that i cannot enter unless i change into something with sleeves.



Coincidentally, i had this long sleeved sweater in my bag, so i just put it on and that was how i ended up wearing a long sleeve shirt in a straight club.

Alter: With a plunging neckline may i add.

Adi: It's not plunging.

Alter: Then what would you call that?

Adi: Chest baring? (laughs)

Alter: And then sources said that you made your way to tantrix after that?

Adi: Oh wait! before that, may i add that i just found out that gays are so much of better dancers
than straights. Cos when i was at The Arena, i saw a couple of gay guyz who are so well dressed and their dance moves really stand out from the crowd of straight people!

Alter: And now can we get back to the question?

Adi: Yes. i did go to tantrix later that night cos i promised a straight collegue that i will accompany him and some other friends there.

Alter: But sources also suggested that when you were at The Arena, you were messaging a certain someone that you might drop by to tantrix as HE was at play?

Adi: Ok. That was true. Actually that certain sumone asked me if i was going to play that night. and i told HIM that i might be dropping by tantrix. And HE said drop him a message if i got to tantrix, which i did. I was presuming he might want to meet me there. But when he replied saying he was drunk in PLAY, all i said to him was "OK. Enjoy!" And then from there on, i just made my way home with my straight colleague.

Alter: hhhmmm?

Adi: Ok. IF you are implying that there have been something going on with this certain person and me, i must admit that i had a crush on him but he seemed confused on whether he still wants to patch up with his EX or just move on. And amidst all this confusion, I just don't want to add to the complication. So it's better that i just be friends with him and nothing more. But then again, let's save this to another post. For now, let's just end it with a high note.

Alter: Such as?

Adi: I HAD FUN WITH MY POLY MATES at THE ARENA. yes. we should do this gain after the fasting month.

Note to JY: I like your tag so much and decided to quote it " After all the bitchfest, blogwars, flying walkie talkies, and shouting matches, here we are still as friends."

Note to Suhaila: Though i might have changed a little towards becoming, in your words, "party animals", you can rest assure that i am still me. I know my limits. I will stick to my policy of no drinking and no smoking. And i promise not to take work for granted!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

HAPPY birthday AUDREY


Adi: Before we start today’s session, I just wanna take this opportunity to say Happy Birthday to Audrey. I think she is absurdly worried about reaching 30 in 4 years. So my advice is, enjoy now, worry later. If anyone is suppose to be worried about getting 30 first, it should have been me. And I would have no qualms at all sharing my experience with her about being 30, 7 months before she does.

Alter: So what did you do for her birthday?

Adi: We just had dinner together. Or rather they had dinner together and i joined them later for the cake cutting session. It was simple yet very fulfilling. Oh yes, could someone please remind me that I have not gotten Audrey anything for her birthday. Erm, make it a whole list of people added to that.

Alter: And i heard sumone's EX was there?

Adi: Oh yeah. We were cool about it. We atlaked as per normal, asking one anotehr how we are doing and stuffs.

Alter: The usual formalities i see?

Adi: it's not that. It's like we are over it. She is happy with her partner, though she seemd a little shocked when i told her that i am single and that i just broke up with my BF last March.

Alter: Uh-huh.

Adi: And i finally got to meet Lyana, her current other half.

Alter: And?

Adi: Well, they seemed happy. And Lyana is a very nice person to talk with and hang out with. And considering that this relationship, i think is her longest, i am sure she is happy, and i only wish her the best in life. (smiles)

Alter: How about you?

Adi: What?

Alter: When are you goign to get attached?

Adi: Truthfully, I have no idea. When the time comes,i guess it will just happen. For now, i just want to concentrate on work.

Alter: Sounds very much like a textbook answer.

Adi: Really? whatever it is, here are the pictures from that night. Enjoy!













Adi: I just realised that i didn't have the group pictures. Whoeevr who have it, didn't post it up in FACEBOOK! bluek!

P.s: See Jiayuan, if you invite me and i said i will come, it means i will come. You didn't invite me to your birthday loh, so not my fault that i didn't turn up for it....hehehe

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Eat some more, eat some more



Alter: What a title for today's posting?

Adi: I know. But todays' posting is all about eating.

Alter: Really?

Adi: Yes. Some of you may have already known that I have this craving for durian mooncakes. The only reason why for em to look forward to mooncake festival is because of the mooncakes. Does that make sense to you?

Alter: Uh-huh. Move along now.

Adi: And so every year i am always on the lookout for buddies to bring along to satisfy my mooncakes craving. and This year I have my beloved sister, Cindy, to accompany me. Just a little note here, last year, it was with JY. And if last year i went to Swensens to relish in ym cravings, this year me and Cindy went to Goodwood hotel.




Alter: And speaking of Cindy, i heard she even blogged about the whole experience. Let me have the honour of quoting this woman from her blog, Fly

hey hey..tis is mahad..my 'sister' at work..look at his huge muscles..ummm..abit cannot see liao hor..haha..he treated me to goodwoods's durian mooncake and durian crepe which were sedap!!!we aso had mango mooncake..hot choco n cappucino..he refuse to let me see e bill but i know its nt cheap lo..hehe..its suppose to be a high class place but hoho..we were making a hell lot of noise..totally no image at all..as ever..had so much fun!!!hehe..1st time there,a bit mountain tortoise..so i asked e waitress quite abit of qn..feel so paiseh..but mahad says its ok..e waitresses are trained to ans qn, so we should ask em as many qn as possible to let em flaunt their talents!!!hahah...we cont to ask more qn!!!anyway it was eric khoo outside e glass panel..we keep waving to him 'TALENTED ACTORS HERE AVAILABLE FOR USE!!!!' we were so excited to see him n we count it to destine for us to see him..but later mahad suddenly realise tt goodwoods is the hotel of his father..hooo..MAhad!!!you still owe me treats!!!!

Adi: Yes. that reminds me, i still owe her one last treat after that day.

Alter: Oh. Can you bring me along the next time you are eating with this talented lady?

Adi: How do you know that she is talented?

Alter: IT takes one to know the other

Adi: Are you saying that you are talented?

Alter: Waht do you think?

Adi: Well. I am not going to argue on that fact, cos as they say, birds of a feather flock together. and that is why we are doing this Adi and Alter show together.

Alter: You've got a point there.

Adi: Oh yes. And after the food fiesta, we went over to Seoul Garden where we both eat to our hearts content, of course joined by our beloved Zamri, Suhaila and Hairul, where we not onyl eat, but eat and bitch at the same time, while oogling at cute guys and gals. IT is just too bad i didn't have any pictures yet, cos most of the pictures were taken by Suhaila and Cindy. Adn Suhaila have problems posting it up on FACEBOOK cos this is suppsoed to be a hush hush thing.

Alter: which part of it is supposed to be a hush hush thing?

Adi: the whole thing about us eating together at Seoul Garden cos not many people knew that we planned it way before in July.

Alter: But you are blogging about it?

Adi: Oh yeah.

Alter: So now the cat is out fo the bag?

Adi: i don't think so. and i am keeping my fingers crossed. not many people read my blog anyway.

Alter: God forbids.

Adi; and before i let out any more cats from the bag, i think we should just end
today's episode here. this is Adi signing out.

Alter: See you in another episode of Adi and Alter.





Sunday, August 10, 2008

What if...



what if god was one of us
just a slob like one of us
just a stranger on a bus
tryin to make his way home

OOps. Wrong songs to use i guess.This posting is nothing about god. IT is just about something which i used to wonder. Anyway i m sure i am not the only one. i am pretty sure some people always wondered what would they say or do if they were to be struck by an incurable or a terminal disease like cancer, or worst AIDS.

I always thought that if i should ever discover that i had contracted AIDS, i would just ignore it and just live normal and you know keep everything wrapped up within myself. I will not tell anyone. And i will not even bring it up to anyone's attention for fear ostracization.

But not anymore...

Cut to
Adi: You know, I went for an anonymous HIV testing.
Audrey and JY: And?
Adi: What?
Audrey and JY: The result?
Adi: Negative. (smiles)
Audrey and JY: (gives otu a sigh of relief)
Audrey: Adi. If you should ever found out that you have AIDS or any other terminal disease for
that matter, you would come and look for me and tell me, right?
Adi: OF course i will
Audrey: Promise?
Adi: Promise
Audrey: I don't want you to become like one of those loners with no one to tell about their sickness. We will all be ehre for you, you know that right?
Adi: I know that, and that is why i feel so blessed.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

What do you say to help a colleague reject someone



The following is an exchange of the SMS between Adi and Mr R; Adi helping Ms D to reject Mr R.

Mr R: Hi Bro. What you doing? Still working at Sentosa?

Adi: Work is normal if not boring. You still studying?

Mr R: Ya. I'm still studying...decided to retake my O level. So how are the rest? how is Diana?


Adi: She's ok. Still single. Y? U fancy her eh?

Mr R: Have always been, but she thinks i m too cheeky though i m not. How is Beep by the way?

Adi: He still in NS. So r u goin to court Diana?

Mr R: Trying to, but i can only date her after my O level exam. Can you help me with that bro?

Adi: I'm sori bro. But she no longer like guyz.

Mr R: What?! you mean she is a lesbian?! Oh my god! That Ex of ehrs must have screwed ehr the wrong way!

Adi: I'm afraid she has turned to liking girls now.

Mr R: Shit! she is a lesbian now! life has always been such a bum for me. Btw, how is Q doing?

Adi: She is attached to a ranger in Sentosa.

Mr R:DAmn it! never mind. if she was meant to be mine, she will be mine!

Adi: Bro. I gtg. Show abt to start soon.

Mr R: Okay. see you guyz around.

Note: Girls, if you wanna shake off any guyz from your tails, just claim yourself to be a lesbian.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Post break up part 2


Through SMS-es...

Amir: Awk. Am i a bad person?
Adi: Erm.. i think you should know yourself better. Do you think you are a bad person?
Amir: I think i am ok jer.
Adi: Ifyou think you are okie, the you are okie loh. Cuma i nak tanya one question. Asal when you got attached you nvr tell me? I tot we made a pact to inform each other if we have moved on so that no one will be waiting for another in vain. But when you got attached, u din tell me. U made me wait for you like a fool.
Amir: Cos my BF said u haf an affair with Daen when we are still together.
Adi: Wat?! Me adn din we r just colleagues. I did not even do anything with him after wat happened last year. I m so disappointed. I tot u knew me better.
Amir: No. Because info dier semua betul.
Adi: Whatever. I hope you are happy with him now.

And then days after that, Amir and his new BF broke up. I guess what goes around comes around...

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Anti-Stress Activity



Most people know that when I have an utter disregard for a person, I would usually blog about them. This time around, I decided to move it up a notch by videoing about them. They say a picture say a thousand words, a video contains thousands of pictures. So you do the maths on how many words a video convey...


Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Once upon a time...



Once upon a time, I know i was FAT. Even have the picture to prove it...



Even from a high angle picture, i look fat.


And i secretly wish i could find a miracle potion that would make me look as buff as him




Looking at the above pictures, i suddenly am happy with my situation right now

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

8 things to know about lemons



Fri, May 02, 2008, The Straits Times

1 Lemons are thought to have originated in the wild both in China> and India and have been in existence for at least 4,000 years. They were> taken to the Middle East between 400 and 600 BC and then to the> Mediterranean where food historians say they have been in cultivation from> as early as the first century AD.

> > 2 The next time you have a sore throat, reach for this citrus fruit.> Add the juice of one lemon to an equal amount of hot water for an> anti-bacterial gargle, advises www.sunkist.com, which also says a bowl of> fresh lemons will add fragrance and colour to a room for days.

> > 3 The lemon is very low in saturated fat, cholesterol and sodium. It> is also a good source of folate and potassium, and an excellent source of> vitamin C, according to www.nutritiondata.com

> > 4 A medium lemon (about 60g) contains just 15 calories, which> include 5g carbohydrate, 1g dietary fibre and 4g sugars.

> > 5 You can store lemons at room temperature for about two weeks. They> will keep for up to six weeks in a plastic bag in the refrigerator,> www.foodreference.com says.

> > 6 Lemon juice is often cited as a good stain remover. For rust> stains from clothing, moisten the spot with lemon juice, sprinkle with salt> and leave in the sun for a couple of days, advises> www.fairfaxfresh.com/facts, which has a list of other tips on the uses of> lemons.

> > 7 Lemon juice helps in cleansing our body of impurities. Its vitamin> C content helps prevent diseases and believers in natural remedies favour> it for treating asthma, colds, coughs, heart burn, liver complaints, fevers> and rheumatism. It helped prevent scurvy in navigators of old.

> > 8 The lemon as a fashion statement? During the Renaissance in> Europe, fashionable ladies were said to have used lemon juice to redden> their lips.




This story was first published in the Mind Your Body supplement on Apr 30,> 2008.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

The thing with Iz-tahi



There is this person, let’s just call him Iz-tahi. Adi has been noticing him around during clubbing sessions with a few friends. Adi then expressed his interest in this person through a fren this fren then went to inform Iz-tahi. And so he messaged Adi one day and...

Iz-tahi: Hi Adi.

Adi: Hi. Who is this?

Iz-tahi: Izwan. Gab’s friend.

Adi: Oh. You are juz friend also right? The one who teaches malay dance? No class
today?

Iz-tahi: No. My class cancel? U?

Adi: Oh. Me ngah work pat sentosa now.

Iz-tahi: Ok. Tak teach drama today?

Adi:Nope. Now me oni teach every Tuesday. Btw how are you?

Iz-tahi: I’m ok so far. Doin good. But quite busy. Hehe...

Adi: Busy with wat?

Iz-tahi: Dance...got production

Adi: Oh i thought busy finding bf.

Iz-tahi: Eh eh...ish tak dapat seh...heheheh. u? Tak cari?

Adi: Tak ah. Malas nak cari but there is sumone I fancy.

Iz-tahi: Haiyo. Sape? Kepo eh. Hehehe

Adi: It is juz’s and gab’s fren. He is a maly dancer and he teaches malay dance to skuls also.

Iz-tahi: Ok. So the person dat u like is sumone i noe...i think...hehehe

Adi: Yup, i think u know him very well.

Iz-tahi: Hmmm...let me ask that person first aite.

Adi: oh dat would be great!

Iz-tahi: OH. Actually can tell u nw... the person has told me the story long time
ago...he said dat he was interested in u quite sumtimes ago.

ADi: Really? Then how come he never say anything?

Iz-tahi: Maybe dia malu ker? Or maybe u ader bf at that time?

Adi: Actually i also have been liking him for quite sumtiems, but i shy to say to
him.

Iz-tahi: ye ke? That person think u r cute. Bt he da perasan u quite long time ago... Since at powerhouse in December.

And so the mushy messages went on for a bit, but then suddenly Iz-tahi just went silent. Adi did message him things like ”good morning” and “how are you?” but he didn’t reply. He just went DEAD. That is until end of June when he suddenly messaged...

Iz-tahi: Hey, how r u? Sorry for not msging u coz i was really really busy. It’s okay if you don’t want to reply back. I understand.

And so Adi called and the following conversation followed...

Adi: Ni Izwan mana eh?

Iz-tahi: Gab’s fren. Malay dancer.

Adi: Oh. Lama tak dengar khabar?

Iz-tahi: Eh dah lupa ker?

Adi: No. It’s just that I never ehar from for so long, jadi macam lupa sekejap.

Iz-tahi: Sorry ah been busy.

Adi: Just a question. You slalu ajar kat skola u naik aper?

Iz-tahi: Bus?

Adi: Slalu journey kat dalam bas berapa lama?

Iz-tahi: Depends ah. Sumtimes 45 minit, sumtimes1 hour plus. Asal?

Adi: Abeh dalam bus tu slalunyer u tak buat ape ape kan?

Iz-tahi: Tidur?

Adi: Oh. Tak. Cos iw as wondering. Slalu nak reply message will take about 3 minit
ah paling lama kan. Jadi kalau busy un tak kan lah dalam bas tu tak leh spare 3
minit of ur time to reply my messages kan?

Iz-tahi: (laughs, uncomfortably) Tak lah. I reall sorry for not replying to ur messages.

But by this time around, Adi just think this guy is just in it for the fun of it, to boost his ego, So that he can tell his crew that he has sumone liking him. Adi thinks that no matter how busy a person is, it only takes a few second to message sumthin to show that u care. Adi is just as busy u know... But he does have time to reply messages... If he din, it means he is pissed off with u.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Disease Alert



CDC ALERT



The Centre for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically.

This virus is called Weary Overload Recreational Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues or anyone else via any means whatsoever - DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely.



If you should come into contact with WORK, you should immediately leave the premises. Take two good friends to the nearest grocery store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.



You should immediately forward this medical alert to your friends. If you do not have friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

p.s:Something to crack your day if it is as stressful as mine....

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

I know we're cool



Imagine that it was 8pm. You were in some crowded gym. You were already irritated as you have never liked crowds, let alone to be with them in a gym! You were wearing some random army singlet and a short blue shorts. You worked out.

Now imagine yourself all wet with perspiration. The air-con is not working properly. You were breathless from all the working out. You look tired. Wait. You are tired.

Now imagine that before the gym routine, you were at Sentosa. No. Not to bath in the glorious sun. But more like working and freezing your ass off in the museum. This is followed by 2 hours tolerating little kids going “teacher! Teacher adi!” well, on the bright side, they are among the rare people who got your name right.

Now imagine yourself near exhaustion from all these. Then came the all too familiar voice “Awak! Awak! Work out kat sini.” You could only cough out the word “Awak dah sampai sini lama.” There was an awkwardness in the air. All you could think is why is this turd smiling from ear to ear.

Now imagine that there is a song for every memories and emotions. And the only song that came shortly after that short encounter is the following song:



It's hard to remember how it felt before
Now I found the love of my life...
Passes things get more comfortable
Everything is going right

And after all the obstacles
It's good to see you now with someone else
And it's such a miracle that you and me are still good friends
After all that we've been through
I know we're cool

We used to think it was impossible
Now you call me by my new last name
Memories seem like so long ago
Time always kills the pain

Remember Harbor Boulevard
The dreaming days where the mess was made
Look how all the kids have grown
We have changed but we're still the same
After all that we've been through
I know we're cool

And I'll be happy for you
If you can be happy for me
Circles and triangles, and now we're hangin' out with your new girlfriend
So far from where we've been
I know we're cool

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Horror-scope



The Bottom Line
One of your relationships is reaching a turning point. It may be time to move on.

In Detail
Today, all signs point to the fact that one of your relationships might be reaching a turning point. You need to see things as they really are and make that decision that you have been dreading. Is it time to let them go? Things are not equitable between you two, and if they haven't made an effort to change, then the answer may be 'yes.' Talk to them today and find out how they feel about things. If they see a problem, there's hope. But if they think everything's fine, move on.


p.s: HOW APT!

Post Break up

05.06.2008

After the break-up, Adi and Amir still contacted each other. Adi tried to patched things up, but Amir kept on sayin that he is not ready. Adi and Amir then made a pact; that if either of them should find someone they want to settle with, they should inform each other, so that no one will be waiting in vain. But along the way, Amir suddenly went DEAD, until one day...

Amir: Awk. How r u?
Adi: I am fine. Thank you.
Amir: Awk kita no longer werkin at aldo tau. So kita da takde pat vivo.
Adi: oh. Abe hawk keje pat mana skrg?
Amir: Kite mintak admin kat DHL. Entah can get or not.
Adi:So skrg nie u menganggur?
Amir: Yeah. Sebab kerja i rabak ah. I nak mintak off pun susah. Then i kena keje almost non stop. When i apply urgent leave terus diorang terminate i cakap attendance poor. Btw, did u find sumone oredi?
Adi: Nope.
Amir: Oh ok.
Adi: I know you are attached already?
Amir: Mana awak tahu?
Adi: Sumone lah told me. Sumber yang boleh dipercayai.
Amir: Saper awk? I bukan nyer popular sey...
Adi: Ade lah...
Amir: Awk, bilanglah awk. Pls...
Adi: Not important ;ah who told me. Yang penting u happy with the person u r attached with.
Amir: K la. I dun force u. Awk tahu, my father tak habis habis seh bising pasal i tak keje. Dier asik cakap pasal future lah semua keluar.
Adi: Maybe dia nak ngok u jadi father yang responsible one day.
Amir: I jady father. Haha. No way i tak akan kawin awk U...we still fren rite?
Adi: Yup.
Amir: I takmo lost contact with u.
Adi: Insya’allah tak awk...

Friday, May 23, 2008

Diary of a Man



Saw the following in my email. Thought it deserves to be publicised here in my blog. Enjoy... The Diary of a Man...

1. When I was born, I got a choice - A big dick or a
good memory. I'm unable to remember what I chose.

2. Your birth
certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

3. A wife is a
sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.

4. Impotence: It's
nature's way of saying 'no hard feelings'.

5. There are only two four
letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop'; unless they are
used together.

6. Panties are not the best thing on earth, but next to
the best thing on earth.

7. There are three stages to sex in a person's
life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.

8. Virginity can be
cured.

9. Virginity is not dignity; it's a lack of
opportunity.

10. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a
good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

11. I tried phone sex once,
but the holes in the dialer were too small.

12. Marriage is the only war
where you get to sleep with the enemy.

13. Q: What's an Australian kiss?
A: The same thing as a French kiss; only down under.

14. A newly married
couple was happy with the 'whole thing'. He was happy with the Hole and she was
happy with the Thing!

15. Q: What are the three biggest tragedies in a
man's life? A: Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't.

16. Q: What's
the difference between a ***** and a whore? A: A whore sleeps with everyone at
the party and a ***** sleeps with everyone except you.

17. Q: Why do men
find it difficult to make eye contact? A: Breasts don't have eyes.

18. Of
course you've heard about the Viagra computer virus; it turns your 31/2 inch
floppy into a hard disk.

19. despite the old saying, “Don’t take your
troubles to bed”, many men still sleep with their wives!!!

Saturday, May 17, 2008

The Life Pattern of Adi



I begin to realise something. This blog has a pattern. My life has pattern. An annual pattern that is. I usually fell in love in December. Then stay in the relationship till February or March. Then break up. In April and May, I would have been in depressions. That is when I would blogged religiously. Then I would have my long lists of Rendezvous, crushes and random dates in June, July and August. In September, I would be too absorbed with Hari Raya Preparations. In October and November I would be too absorbed in work. Then in December, I would fall in love again. And the cycle goes on. That is why, if you had noticed, my blog is most active in April and May.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Case of the EX part 3



Dear I-think-you-know-who-you-are,

It was quite unbelievable for me that you are still reading my blog even after all through this years, we have been keeping silence from each other. And I know you will still continue to read on even after this entry. And I know you will thirst for an entry from me when I stopped blogging. As shameless as it may seem, but I know these are all true. What do you expect? Theatre people are meant to have thick skin, or they will not survive in the industry. My one year plus experience have taught me that.

Anyway, this entry came out as a sympathy for you more than anything else. Nope. It’s not my plea for patch up. I will not put myself through another scary movie. Scary movie is actually funny but not the relationship with you. Though there have been times when I actually wish I could make things right, you know say the right thing and do the right thing for you after the break up. Again, not because I want get close to you again, it is more of a clean record thing, you know so you will not be able to bitch about me.

Moving on, this entry is to advice you on what to do and what not to do in the future, cos I have been hearing too many bad reviews about you. And everytime I hear these bad reviews, I can’t help but to think “kesiannyer budak nie”. So here is my advice:

1. When you club, please practice some decency. Do not take off your top, cos first of all you are just bones and skin and you are just so skinny, that you don’t really much to show off anyway. It is actually quite a disturbing scene for most clubbers, especially those who went to play and St James. I have not heard any bitching going on with patrons from Taboo, but then again, better not start, right?

2. And also try not to budge in to people’s conversation at Maxwell. You may think that you know everything, but then again you’re just turning 21. there are so much things to be explored. Trust me. So don’t go around to people’s table and start dishing advise like as if you know everything, cos you know nothing.

3. I have heard a lot of people in the theatre scene talking about you. They say you have not turned up for shows before and was late on numerous occasions. They say you have been irresponsible. God, even people in the Front of House are bitching about you. And yet I still clearly remember back then, about two years ago, you told me that I will not be able to survive in the industry cos I was not disciplined enough. And you even told me to try other career path. How ironic? I think that is very hypocrite of you. Say one thing to me and do another. Well. Here I am torn between advising you not to be in the theatre industry (as you have told me off back then), or just stop being a hypocrite. I think I should not be mean and should just advise you to still act, but just stop being a HYPOCRITE. I MEAN I REALLY LIKE YOUR ACTING. YOU COULD REALLY PULL OFF AN AWARD WINNING PERFORMANCE. Your acting is so believable that it had me fooled on so many occasions. I especially like the act on the god brother thingy. What’s his name again? Nasri Is it? You told me that he was your god brother. Little did I know he was actually a married man who was expecting a child and he just so happens TO BE YOUR SEX BUDDY and that you have been fucked by him on so many occasions. Yup. That act was so believable, I would have still believed that he is just an innocent by-stander in our relationship if I haven’t stumbled on the truth.

4. I can’t believe you tried to get fresh with my EX. FYI, he don’t really like skinny guys.

5. Patrons of Taboo and Play and Powerhouse, they may be clubbers, but not all of them are the touch and go type of people. So stop treating ALL of them like that.

6. I would have gone on to advise no 6 when I suddenly discover that you are a case of beyond help. So I decided to just stop.


Yous truly (or maybe you would have used a fancier term like bastard?)
Adi

Monday, May 12, 2008

Translation



Adi: You know. I was listening to Fly FM this morning, and they were talking about some direct translation in subtitles for some movies.

Alter: Direct translation?

Adi: Yeah. Like for example, I have watched an English movie with a direct translation for its subtitle. You know on some DVDs, they have the option where you can choose to have the Malay subtitle up. A good example will be in Chicago during the Cell Block Tango. In this part, the characters are singing, “He has it coming, he has it coming.” And the Malay subtitles, it was written “Dia ada nye datang, Dia ada nye datang.”

Alter: (laughs) Really?

Adi: Yeah. So I thought what the heck, for this section, why not we play a little game of Malay-English Translation. You give me the name of movies and I translate it for you.

Alter: Okay. You ready?

Adi: Yes. Ready.

Alter: First up, Chronicles of Narnia.

Adi: Kroni-kasi Narnia.

Alter: Cool. Second one. Puaka Sundal Bolong

Adi: Erm. Curse of the Slut called Bolong?

Alter: Are you sure?

Adi: Well. Puaka is curse in Malay. Sundal is slut. I just assume bolong is the name?

Alter: Okay. Next. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Adi: Eh…I Love that movie. Starring Kate Winslet and Jim Carrey. His first non-funny role. Okay. Here it goes. The translation: Matahari dalam Kepala Otak Udang.

Alter: Kepala otak kau. Here is the next one: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines.

Adi: Penghapus Tiga: Terbitnyer Mesin.

Alter: A malay movie called Masam Masam Manis?

Adi: Erm. Sour sour sweet?

Alter: Monster-in-Law

Adi: Mertua Raksaksa?

Alter: Dangerous Minds

Adi: Kepala Otak Merbahaya

Alter: Lost in Translation.

Adi: Sesat Dalam Translasi

Alter: Indiana Jones: Jewel of the Nile

Adi: Jones Keling: Barang Kemas Ni-ler

Alter: Superman.

Adi: Supar-man

Alter: Ayat- Ayat Cinta

Adi: Sentence sentence love

Alter: Bujang Lapuk

Adi: Dusty Bachelor.

Alter: Heavy rain

Adi: hujan berat

Alter: Raining cats and dog.

Adi: Hujan kucing anjing.

Alter: Musuh DaLam Selimut

Adi: Enemy in my Blanket. I still wonder what the enemy will be doing under your own blanket with you.

Alter: Boogeyman

Adi: Lelaki bogel.

Alter: Sumpahan Orang Minyak

Adi: Curse of Oily Man.

Alter: Woah. Not bad ah your translation skills.

Adi: Yes. Hopefully it would be helpful in my next malay production, Kisah Cinta Romzi dan Juleha, the Malay adaptation of Romeo and Juliet, to be staged in Esplanade in this coming July. Details will be provided with time to come. (smiles)

Alter: And with that, we’ve come to the end of this episode. See you again.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

When convincing acting saves someone from the embarassment of being caught sleeping at work



two ladies entered Images of Singapore through the exit and found themselves at the Festive Garden's entrance. Adi was at the station. They briefly chat and then the two ladies make their way up to family album. Mid-way, both of them stopped.

Lady 1: Is it just me or did u hear it as well?

Lady 2: Ya..I heard it too.

Lady 1 (to Adi): Come....did u hear that?

Adi: Hear what?

Lady 1: That sound....

Adi: No...there's no sound...

Lady 2: There! Listen...

All three listen intensely...

Adi: No...nothing..

Lady 1: There is! Listen...it sounded like someone snoring....

Adi: No...there isn't

Lady 1: It couldn't be just the both of us right...

Lady 2: there there....listen again...

Adi: No...I din hear anything..

Lady 1: Are u sure there's nobody under here...

Adi: no...it is just some storage space..

Lady 2 : but i'm sure we heard snoring.

Lady 1 moves down and about to go underneath the staircase..

Lady 1: Are you sure there's nobody under that?

Adi: Yes....it is just some storage space. the only thing there is my drink and my scripts.

Lady 1: ouh....come let's go...

both women move off bewildered....

Lady 1 is Sentosa's Head of Marketing.
Lady 2 is Suzzane Ho, THE coveted ex-anchorwomen, whos' with Sentosa now.
and the sound that causes this conversation was indeed snoring....by Zamri.

Monday, May 05, 2008

When I first hear Rihanna’s Please Don’t stop the Music, I told my EX that the song is actually an old song. And he, being a true blue devoted Rihanna’s fan, kept insisting that it is a new song. And after I heard Madonna La Isla Bonita, then I realized that Rihanna’s song actually sampled Madonna’s song and thus that is why I kept thinking Please Don’t Stop the Musci is an old song. If you don’t believe me, try playing both songs, and you shall soon discover what I discovered. Now play Madonna’s song first…




And now play Rihanna’s song and pay attention to the part at 1.30min. and again at 2.17min



And thus I concluded, that Rihanna’s song is a new song with samplings from Madonna’s song.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

A Letter sent- intended



My parents always told me be careful of what you do, cos your deed now could change your life forever in the future. Like the saying goes “Your past might just come to bite back you in the ass”. And till today, I still cherished my life, be it in JC, NS or Polytechnic. I have never by far regretted any of my actions, be it bad or good. I am always thankful for the good experience and learnt from the bad. I will always to thank Him for all the blessings and I will always thanks Him for the strength that He gave me for the challenges He laid down for me.

Anyway, one of my past kinda caught up with me when in received this letter:

Hi Adi, or Mahadi as i use to call you back in NS... Well... Its been a long time

Since we ended our NS stint but i still missed the old days don't you agree?

The laugh, sorrow, stress, jokes and fun we all used to share among us.

We're like brothers you see. Well, only during NS and after that, we all went

On our separate ways and busy with our own other thing.

Things are different now... wish how i could turn back time and start doing

It all again. Hah!

But we're in the future and there's no way you can go back in time. Nonsense!

Ok, i won't drag anymore stories as i might scare that you get bored...

If you really want to know who i am, well here goes...

I'm Noorisman from BRTC Head Pers Office. Remember Lta Tang Kok Lian?

So it's ok if you don't wanna reply to this message as i understands it

Clearly as to why? Anyway, saw you once at a play with my girl friend.

Told them that you use to be my friend and they ask me what happened?

They ask me to forgive and forget and so here i am.

I'm sorry bro to you and all the other bro that i didn't get the chance to

Say sorry to. Well... Goodnight, sweet dreams and sleep tight alright?

P.S. Im now in Sydney Australia and will be back before labour day. I've been here for a months already and its damn cold here because its winter time here... the time now is 0217hrs here

Okay. Just a little bit about Noorisman. He is one of the NSF attached to my camp. He was in PERS department and I was in OPS department. Anyway, I didn’t really talked to him much, I was a quiet person back in NS. The one who was close to him was my close friend, Faizal. Faizal willa always talk to me about Noorisman, of how he sympathises him with all the family problems and all. Faizal grew closer to Noorisman up to the point that he took him in as a brother. Little did he know, Noorisman was telling him lots of tales and lies. The reason? To garner Faizal’s sympathy and to get closer to Faizal. Faizal suspected that he is not straight. And that is when the whole all NSFs against Noorisman saga started with me being in the i-don’t-care-cos-i-am-in-my-own-world state. After I completed my NS, I went into polytechnic and I didn’t really get any update on that saga, and I didn’t know what happened to Noorisman until I received the little mail he sent me.

The following is my reply:

Hi Noorisman,

There seems to be a lot of issues to be addressed in your mail. I will try my best to address these issues in the most diplomatic ways I could. First of all lots of apologies if I tend to use harsh words in the course of addressing these issues, as you know I have just broke up and thus the jadedness that you might find within this short reply.

The first issue is the term “brother”. Back then in NS I have never believed in that term, cos seeing at how things have been, it was difficult to trust anyone. The only few people I trust would include Faizal and my gym buddy, Wan from PERS. They are the ones who have always been there for me and Wan has been inspiring me to work really hard in the gym. Even then I have never called them brothers or best friends. So I hope you wouldn’t mind if I say I have never seen you as a brother as I have never trusted you or any of the words that came out of your mouth.

With that said, I don’t think you owed me any form of apology, cos seriously I wasn’t the one who is bothered by whatever condition or family related problems you deemed to have back then. I never even bothered to find out if you are straight, bisexual or gay. The person who is very hurt was Faizal. I think you owed him an apology.

Lastly, I hope the few years have made you more matured now, attitude and psychologically wise of course. I wanted to go to Australia earlier this year, but haven’t gotten the opportunity due to workload.


Adi

p.s: You said you saw me in a play? Which one was that?

Oh well, let bygones be bygones. For me I will just forget it and move, cos life is too short for you to bear grudges and dwell in the past.

Monday, April 28, 2008

The Day I was Jinxed?



Alter: Why the pissed off look? Is that your new look for now?

Adi: don’t provoke me. I’m not in the mood.

Alter: Oh. Some one had a rough day eh?

Adi: Rough is an understatement. Today is officially one of the most fucked up day of the year.

Alter: Oh. Tell us. What happened?

Adi: It all began in the early morning. I woke up at 0730. I swore I could have reached work early as I got out of my house at 0825. I decided to take the bus, 963 to be exact. The last time I took this bus, it only took me half an hour to reach sentosa, but this time around, I have no idea why, it took me almost one and a half hour. So I reached work late despite waking up early.

AlteR: Oh. Relax bro. Just being late for work doesn’t really make today your most fucked up day, yes?

Adi: Oh. It didn’t end there. In the afternoon I went to the office to collect contracts to extend the services of some of the artistes. I was told by the person in charge of doing the contract that the contracts should be ready by today. However,, when I went to the office, the contracts were not there. I messaged the person in charge and he told me that the contracts were not ready as he was rushing other stuffs in the morning. So I went up to the third floor to collect cheques for my beloved part timers, only to be told by the finance department that the cheques will only be ready at the end of the week.

Alter: Okay. SO it is just a case whereby there is a delay in cheques and contracts. I don’t think it’s that bad.

Adi: That’s not the end. I took half day leave to attend a rehearsal which was slated to start at 3 on that day. I took a cab to the rehearsal space only to be told that the rehearsal has been cancelled last minute and that the co-ordinator has already messaged everyone about it. Apparently I didn’t receive any notifications. So I make my way back to Sentosa and cancelled off my half day leave.

Alter: WOah! And I assume that is not the end of the story yet?

Adi: Yup. After work, I decided to go to the gym to blew off steam after the sleuth of bad lucks. And guess what? I was locked inside the gym toilet when I was showering, and had to be rescued by the rangers in Sentosa.

Alter: Okay. This is definitely your most unlucky day.

Adi: Yes. Thanks you for listening to my ramblings on my most fucked up day.

Alter sprinkles salt on Adi’s shoulder. A salt enters Adi’s eye. Adi yelled in pain.

Friday, April 25, 2008

A nice one from the ONE AND ONLY, Mariah Carey



Everyone close to me knew that I love this woman to bits. Even though some people criticizes her harshly for lip synching on some shows, I have to admit my admiration towards her only grows with time. Her songs are inspiring and her voice are just incredible (of course I have to admit it was better back then). And her latest song entitled “Bye Bye” brought tears to my eyes when I first listened to it. Here is a live version of the song, and the lyrics. Enjoy!



Lyrics:

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me alive
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
It's something more than saying "I miss you"
But when we talked too
All them grown full things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face

[Chorus:]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the whole world to see your face
And I'm right here next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye

(Bye Bye [3x])
Bye bye

And you never got the chance to see how good I've done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together

I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
That you can make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact you're gone forever

[Chorus]

(bye bye bye bye bye bye [3x])
Bye bye

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandfather
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

[Chorus]

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Dealova?



Let’s admit it. My brother is a MAT REP. the third and fourth one. They wear tappered jeans and pants. Have tails at the back of their head. Hair styled into mowhawks. So when the third brother sold me his N80, along came with it the hords of techno music which I have never heard of in my entire life (except the one sang by Cascada). Anyway, I would have never ever thought that they would also be listening to ballads or what-you-called-it-emo-song. And I was truly surprised to find this particular song in the phone. It is called Once by Dealova. Here is the band singing live at some award show in Malaysia.



aku ingin menjadi mimpi indah dalam tidurmu
aku ingin menjadi sesuatu yg mungkin bisa kau rindu
karena langkah merapuh tanpa dirimu
oh karena hati telah letih
aku ingin menjadi sesuatu yg selalu bisa kau sentuh
aku ingin kau tahu bahwa ku selalu memujamu
tanpamu sepinya waktu merantai hati
oh bayangmu seakan-akan
Chorus:
kau seperti nyanyian dalam hatiku
yg memanggil rinduku padamu
seperti udara yg kuhela kau selalu ada
hanya dirimu yg bisa membuatku tenang
tanpa dirimu aku merasa hilang
dan sepi, dan sepi
repeat reff [2x]
selalu ada, kau selalu ada
selalu ada, kau selalu ada





p.s: I am stuck to this song now. It is literally playing in my head almost on every other day. The lyrics… they are haunting. The song is in malay. If you don’t understand it, try to get someone to translate it to English. Seriously, you should! It would help you to really really appreciate the song.

p.s: I still have no idea why this malay song has an english title. It doesn’t have any english part to the song.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

The Case of the EX



Alter: Which EX are you talking about exactly?

Adi: The X-mother-in-law actually.

Alter: Ooh. Tell us more.

Adi: You see, when I was attached to Rahman like eons ago, I was quite close to his family, especially his grandmother and mother. I could literally talk to his grandmother for hours and she really made me feel like as if I am her grandson. And that was something for me cos I am never close to my own grandmother. So I actually see her as my own grandmother.

Alter: And how about the mother?

Adi: For the mum, it is kinda weird. She was all warmth at first. Then towards the middle part of the relationship, suddenly she was all cold towards me. Rahman said she felt uneasy of how close I was to him. Here is the thing, I have never wanted to join him in his little meals or check-ups with the mum but he always told me that it would be better if tagged along so that his mum could get to know me better. Then when I asked him of his mother sudden change, he told me that maybe I should stop tagging along to his little meet-ups with his mum.

Alter: And then what happened?

Adi: I stopped seeing her, like totally, even until the day I walked off from him.

Alter: Okay.

Adi: Then came the surprise.

Alter: Which is?

Alter: I was on my way to collecting my N80 from the Nokia service center at Suntec when I met his dearest mummy, aka my x-mother-in-law, along citylink mall. And she was once again all warmth and nice. Here is the short excerpt from the conversation we had…

Auntie: Eh Adi.
Adi: Hi auntie. (reached out hand to shake her hand)
Auntie: It has been a long time I last seen you.
Adi: Yeah. How have you been?
Auntie: The same. Normal. You look good.
Adi: Thanks. I like the thing you did to your hair.
Auntie: Thanks. What are you doing now?
Adi: I am working as performer in Sentosa. And I also did a few productions here and there.
Auntie: Are you still using the same number?
Adi: Yeah. Still the same.
Auntie: Okay. I got to go.
Adi: Okay. See you.

Alter: Woah. Pep talk eh?

Adi: (laughs) Anyway, a few minutes later I was further surprised when I received a message from her

Auntie: “Hi Adi. Nice meeting you again. Keep in touch ya. Auntie Diana.”
Adi: Sure. I would definitely be keeping in touch with you especially when I have productions coming up. I know you love watching theatre performances.
Auntie: Thanks. I would definitely come to support you.

Alter: She actually sounded nice. Not you typical mother in law from hell.

Adi: She is nice. I guess the coldness back then was just her own reaction to her own insecurity that I might just steal her son away, which I never dream of doing anyway. He would be such a burden. Come to think of it, she should be thankful if I were to be taking away her only bundle of burden.

Alter: Be nice Adi.

Adi: I will. (laughs)

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

After- effect from the TABOO trip



If you have read about my HOMECOMING TRIP, then I am sure you would have known that I have stepped into TABOO after 6 years since I last stepped in it. Then came a surprising message from an unexpected person. I shall just let you read on...

Suffian:
Saw you at tantric the other day, i think. On 29 march, the nite i attended ashley isham show. You were wearing NUM red party tank. I was wearing blazer. Was with a macho mary friend. Too high. Lol.

Adi's reply:
Yup. That was me alright. I saw you too. It was impossible to miss you since we were both only separated by the guy you were with. He was standing in between us. By the way, I wouldn't exactly label him as Macho Mary; old is more like it. And i saw him keep looking and staring at me. What's up with that?

Anyway, nice hearing from you again. Hope life has been treating you kind.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Technology that might spoil Appetite



Imagine this. It’s lunch hour. You were hungry. You went to this hawker center called Seah Im Hawker Center, located opposite of Harbor Front Center. You sat down. All this while you were enduring the hunger pang in your stomach. And then your phone rang. You got a message.

The message read:
How was your day?

You replied:
Okay. I guess. Still strung up on my ex. Apart from that work has been fine today. Just hungry at the moment.

You received another message. It read:
Aww. Just hang in there k.

And you replied:
Thanks for the word of encouragement.

The person messaged you again:
How long have you not had sex?

You ignored the message and went ahead to order a mee hoon goring from the Indian stall next to the Chinese drink stall. You ate the mee hoon goring. It tasted nice. Spicy… just what you expected; the best mee hoon goring in Singapore.

Then the person messaged you again:
What phone are you using?

You took your time to reply, savoring every fork-ful of mee hoon goring:
N80.

The he went on in his next message:
Can I video call you? I am damn horny. I want to show you my cock.

You almost choke on the last forkful of mee hoon goring. Then you took a deep breath and you replied:
No. I am eating lunch right now!

Then he didn’t message you anymore. You felt peaceful. Just you, the mee hoon goring, and you glass of sugar cane juice. Nothing can come in between the three of you. Not even the idea of a poor cock being jerked off in front of a camera phone. And for a moment, you thanked god that the guy on the other line reads and understands English perfectly well.